Best Hobbies

By my last semester in grad school weekends were a foreign concept, and most days were up by 7am with work ending between 10pm and midnight to keep up with full time classes, writing & presenting research, completing my thesis, and running my business. I don't regret the push, but do recognize that it lead to burnout and a lack of presence in my marriage and other areas of life caused by the long hours, creeping caffeine consumption, and failing energy for exercise and social habits.

Burnout -> Balance

In the two weeks after walking Saint Louis University's ceremonial stage proclaiming my Mastery of Science in Biomedical Engineering, I rested and recovered enough from my hard earned depression and burnout to notice a flicker of inspiration: Run a monthlong self-experiment exploring the best hobbies to bring some fun, non-work activities back into my life with favorites from the past as well as interests I've never tried but always wanted to.

Perhaps you're ready to open the door back to an old favorite or introduce yourself to a new hobby. What's the first activity that comes to mind? Maybe you want to see if there's a class/group/meetup in your city? I found that lots of the classes I was interested in offered a free session or whole week to try out. Perhaps you'd like to add some qualitative and quantitative analysis to a trial you run: Here's a simplified spreadsheet template I made that you're welcome to adapt and use for yourself.

Below is a snapshot of my spreadsheet of data, with each row representing a different class, activity or experiment. The main categories were Exercise, Art/Expression and Social each with subcategories like Martial Arts, Dancing, Drawing, Guitar, and Table Top Games. In the end, I found some of the best hobbies I want to dig into at this time, and my priorities going forward as life evolves. In total I tried 45 different activities and invested 120hrs and $710 In June and early July with this experiment.

Best Hobbies experiment: 45 activities - 120hrs - $710

The rest of this post will go through take-aways that may be useful to you. If you'd like to comment, we'd all love to hear your favorite hobbies, or what you're going to try at the bottom of this page (kind/encouraging responses only, please)!

1. Cast a wide net!
Inquiring and attending many groups to start helped keep up momentum for the month. Like applying for a dozen jobs at once and not just submitting a resume to one and holding my breath for weeks/months, it allowed me to be more relaxed and objective since I knew there were more options if the class I was in didn't land. By exploring many at a time, also I discovered what I most valued by experiencing many similar groups side-by-side. I was able to get a feel for the dogma and culture of a given group vs the core tenants of the discipline. For example, I found that Kickboxing was my favorite exercise from a cardio, mobility and self defense perspective, however, the groups I attended ranged in tone from sparring and competition focused, to form and mitt work focused, to one that felt more like an after school program for teens.

This 'cast a wide net' approach reminds me of the Bullets to Cannonballs concept I love, coined by one of my favorite business writers, Jim Colins.

2. Coaching (& Tutoring) is King.
A podcast I enjoy called "How to Take Over the World" discussed the Two Sigma Problem in an episode published during this month of exploring hobbies. In short, educational scientist Benjamin Bloom was able to demonstrate an increase in student learning by two standard deviations(!) by means of one-on-one tutoring and a high quality teaching method.

This insight was enough to tip me towards continued investment in guitar lessons. I want to push the needle to 98% of my potential learning speed rather than the ~20% I expect I was at, struggling through YouTube tutorials.

3. Social tone is important.
I didn't realize at the beginning of the month how high a priority social dynamics and tone would be for me. It is embedded in groups and communities, modeled by leaders, and carried in the door by the personalities, social norms and expectations each person brings.

I noticed different social tones are preferrable for different activities, for example: as I started drawing lessons, I thought I'd want a silent, focused environment...and I do. But, I also discovered that a group with an open approachability between students (and the teacher) was wonderful for releasing tension between sketches. Occasionally chatting with other students made it a more fun and productive time. Choosing places for hobbies that 'feel' right for the given activity, are highly influenced by the social tone.

4. Expect some discomfort.
Although the primary goal of the best hobbies for you may be having fun, and/or connecting with a new peer group, it's also natural for there to be growing pains at the beginning. This can be the case especially if the new hobby includes meeting new people as you discover a group's social culture, or developing a skill with a learning curve. For example, 5 guitar lessons in, I'm still struggling to make a smooth chord change from C to G, but I know this is just part of the process.

5. You give you permission.
Something that came up for me many times this month was a feeling of whether or not it was OK to do something just for fun, especially if it cost money. Who gives me permission? Shouldn't I use this time to work on my business? Shouldn't I use this money more productively? Fear came up for me around being judged for enjoying my privilege to pursue unnecessary and at times costly hobbies.
This touches on work around self-esteem, taking up space, and social safety that I'm grateful to be working on with my therapist, and nudges me to take another dose of the wisdom from The Four Agreements.

We all ultimately give ourselves permission to do, pursue and learn what we want. In the realm of hobbies and self exploration, there can be intersections with family members or other folks with whom we share time and finances, but it starts with recognizing and owning our own natural interest and desires. If you struggle like I do with fear of judgement, I feel you--and can offer the encouraging findings that in my case, each person I've shared with so far has responded with curiosity and support of my experiment. More importantly I don't think it wouldn't matter or effect me much if they came back at me with a worst case (and completely unreasonable) reaction.

Based on the intentions I had going into this month's hobby experiment and what I learned, the experiences listed below are the top three priorities for my own hobbies going forward:

1. Establish a robust exercise practice: 2+times/week that I enjoy and that integrates cardio, strength and mobility.

2. Develop these skills:
a) Guitar Playing (for personal expression and relaxed campfire playing)
b) Dancing with my lovely wife, Lynn (likely West Coast Swing)
c) Sketching, specifically for products I imagine and want to conceptualize

3. Plug into or start recurring social activities with friends I really enjoy: Doing things like playing strategic board games, having themed dinners, or playing a casual sport like Pickleball.

Here's a Personal Journal going into more depth on all of the hobbies/activities I explored if you're interested. Please feel free to share what you've found to be the best hobbies for you, or the ones you're going to try, in the comments!